Toronto Collection Volume 3 (Toronto Series #10-13) Page 11

  My phone rang, and I reached for it assuming it'd be Sasha. A quick glance at the screen as I raised it to my ear, though, showed a different name.

  "Hey, Larissa. You're not going to believe what I'm doing. Sasha at work--"

  "My phone's nearly dead so listen. I'm leaving."

  I blinked. "What do you mean?"

  "I'm going to Kuwait."

  I couldn't speak for a second. "You're... what? Are you serious?"

  "I'm at the airport right now. I just have to--away."

  I'd missed something there because her phone had gone silent for a second, but the gist was clear and since the silence might have been a low-battery beep I didn't bother making her repeat herself. "Larissa, I don't understand. You're happy here. You have a great life here. Why go there?"

  She gave a burst of laughter that sounded more like a sob. "Happy? Everything sucks. I can't... look, I just wanted you to know. I'm gone. I'll email once I get settled."

  "Why there? What are you--"

  "Teaching. Look, I have to--"

  And the phone went dead.

  *****

  I tried calling again, and sending texts too, but no response. Though I knew she probably wouldn't get it in time, I also sent an email saying I didn't understand but I hoped she'd be happy in Kuwait. I didn't bother including that I couldn't see how running away to the Middle East would help with whatever problems she had, or how she could be a teacher there when she wasn't one here, but I couldn't stop thinking about it. Clearly I hadn't had any idea of what was going on with my friend, and that bothered me.

  After another ten minutes or so Daisy grew tired of imitating her daddy and wanted to play house. Though I still wanted to watch hockey, I figured playing with her would stop me thinking about Larissa so I agreed. We went to the basement playroom, where her huge dollhouse was far better decorated than my apartment, and played for nearly an hour.

  Eventually, though, she began to yawn, and she looked up at me and said, "I want my mommy."

  "I know, honey. She's still with your brother. But I have an idea. If you go to sleep now, when you wake up tomorrow she'll be here." I hoped.

  She thought about this. "You'll read me more stories?"

  Trying not to groan, I said, "Yes."

  "Don't want to go to bed yet," she said, clearly having realized that her babysitter didn't know the routines and could be suckered into doing anything she wanted.

  Since I didn't much want to put her to bed either, I let her stay up, but it didn't take long before she couldn't fight sleep any more and mumbled, "Tired."

  "Let's get you to bed."

  We muddled through the toothbrushing and the bathroom use, which fortunately she could handle on her own, but she didn't know where her pajamas were kept and I couldn't find any in her dresser.

  I suggested she go to bed naked, and she was horrified, but also horrified when I suggested she could sleep in her clothes. I considered texting Sasha for advice but didn't want to interrupt if she'd finally made it in to see a doctor. Glancing desperately around the room to find something, anything, for Daisy to wear, I spotted a long pale pink princess-type dress which looked soft and comfortable. "What about this? Be a princess while you sleep."

  The way she lit up made it clear that she had previously tried and failed to be allowed to sleep in the dress but I didn't much care. I'd warned Sasha I didn't know what I was doing, after all, and the dress wouldn't hurt her.

  Daisy kicked me out of the room so she could get changed, and I stood in the hall listening to her mutter to herself about being a pretty princess until my phone rang again.

  "Hi, Catherine. Hey, got any tips for putting a four-year-old to bed?"

  "Why on earth are you with a four-year-old?"

  I explained, although I didn't like the way she said 'you' as if I were an ax murderer or something.

  When I finished, there was silence, then she said, "Figures. You'll help a coworker but not me."

  "What do you mean? I seem to recall taking Wash to hockey on--"

  "Washington," she said sharply. "And that was only so you wouldn't have to look at condos. It was to help yourself not me."

  "Of course not," I said, but my denial lacked force.

  "See, you know it's true. You just didn't want to be bothered with Mom and Dad. God, I hate being the only one who does anything around here."

  And she hung up before I could even ask why she'd called in the first place.

  Chapter Eighteen

  When Sasha's front door opened, I looked up from the final minutes of the hockey game's second period to see her ushering her exhausted-looking son in. "Hey there. How are you two?"

  I reached for the remote to turn off the TV but she said, "Keep watching for a bit. I need to get Damian to bed but I want to talk to you when I'm done. Do you mind staying a little longer?"

  I didn't, so she began peeling the kid out of his coat, revealing the white cast on his arm, and I turned back to the game to let them do their thing without my interference.

  It had taken me ages to get Daisy ready to sleep, requiring multiple stories and two drinks of water then another bathroom break, but Sasha was in the living room less than ten minutes later. Practice makes perfect, I supposed.

  She dropped into an armchair, looking even more tired than Damian had. "God. That's all I can say. And I'm not even swearing, it's more of a prayer."

  I turned off the TV. "I bet. He's okay now?"

  She nodded. "He'll get everyone to sign the cast tomorrow. I told him they'd all be nice to him."

  I winced and explained how Daisy had been considering some self-mutilation to get attention.

  She giggled a little hysterically. "She's like me, she's got no pain tolerance. She won't do anything. But thanks for telling her not to."

  "No problem. Oh, and she had chicken nuggets for dinner and she's wearing her princess dress because I couldn't find her pajamas. Sorry."

  Another giggle, even more over-wrought. "You totally saved me today. You could have put her in my wedding dress to sleep or covered her in nuggets and I wouldn't care. I don't know what I'd have done without you."

  She took a deep breath, let it out, and tears began to slide down her face. "You have to be tough, you know? When the kid's hurt. But watching them set his little arm... I can still see it." She squeezed her eyes shut. "Daniel always picks the worst times to go scouting for new clients. Hell of an anniversary I've had, all by myself."

  I didn't know what to say, so I settled for making a supportive sound.

  She scrubbed her eyes with the heels of both hands. "Sorry. You don't need to see me getting all stupid. I'm starving. Did you eat?"

  I nodded. "Lasagna." I held up the bag of chips I'd swiped from the cupboard. "And about half of these. Hope that's okay. Want some?"

  She shook her head. "I have these amazing oranges. Damian's school sells them. Just came in from Florida yesterday. I'll have one of those." She heaved herself out of the chair. "You're welcome to stay here as long as you want but I'm sure you'd probably like to get home."

  I stood too and gathered the chip bag and my drinking glass to take them back to the kitchen. "My dog will be wondering where I am."

  "True," she said as we left the living room. "Look, Lydia, I really can't thank you enough. I'm so grateful."

  "No big deal."

  She shook her head. "Huge big deal. You gave up your night for me." She looked around the kitchen. "Please, take a few of these oranges. And those chips, if you want them. And..."

  She scanned the kitchen again and I tried to hold back a grin. She reminded me of how Paddington often greeted me at the door with a gift to welcome me home. "Really, it's okay. Daisy's adorable and we had fun."

  "She didn't make you read too many of those princess books, I hope."

  "I'm afraid so. But I survived."

  She shook her head. "I won't read her more than two a day. They're too sickly sweet, and I don't like the whole 'my prince will save
me from the monster' bit."

  I was afraid she was about to tell me that Daniel was more the monster than the prince, and I didn't feel like standing in her gorgeous house and hearing how awful her marriage was, so I said, "Well, she's had about a week's worth then. I hope they didn't rot her teeth. Okay, I'll see you tomorrow."

  She held out an orange. "Take a few if you like citrus. Daniel won't be back until the weekend and I'd hate for them to go bad."

  The fruit looked and smelled amazing, so I said, "Sure, if you don't mind."

  "Not at all," she said, packing four into a plastic bag. "I hope you enjoy them. Oh, and I'm sorry but I can't drive you home. Can't leave the kids."

  I blinked. "I wasn't expecting you to. You're right near the subway station. Not a problem."

  Her turn to blink. "I was going to get you a taxi. You shouldn't have to take the subway alone so late at night."

  I glanced at my watch. Nine-fifteen. Apparently our ideas of 'late' weren't quite the same. "Really, I'm fine. Try to enjoy what's left of your evening."

  She smiled. "I'm going straight to bed. But thanks again. See you tomorrow."

  I headed off to the subway station, as always enjoying the soft quietness of a snowy winter night, and was soon rattling along toward my stop running through the events of the day in my mind. All the time spent with Daisy, the typically angry phone call from Catherine, who had no doubt only wanted to complain about our parents' refusal to move, and the deeply odd one from Larissa.

  Paying attention to Daisy had stopped me thinking of Larissa but now I thought and worried. How would she survive in the Middle East? Why was she even going there? And why hadn't I known anything about it?

  Catherine had said she was the only one who did anything. I knew that wasn't true, but I also knew I hadn't done as much as I could to help with our parents. My sister had done most of the care Mom needed after breaking her hip because I'd been busy with work, and she was also shouldering most of the condo-decision effort. I had helped, but I could have done more. Now I thought maybe I should have.

  I hadn't been there for my parents, or for Larissa. Percy was either sick or avoiding work, and I wasn't doing much about that either. I'd been so focused on getting Cassandra's job but right now I didn't like who I was becoming in the pursuit of it.

  When I got off the subway, still stressing, and began to head home I almost passed Jack's diner but then stopped and looked at the cheesecake display in his window. I'd been staying away since I'd felt so uncomfortably full last time, but after the day I'd had surely I deserved a little treat. I didn't usually take the cheesecake home since it was better eaten at Jack's, but I needed to take care of Paddington so I figured slightly less delicious cheesecake was better than none at all.

  Minutes later I was back on the street carrying a white cardboard box that contained the biggest slice of cheesecake I'd ever seen. Jack had insisted I was doing him a favor taking it because it was too big to be a slice for one normal customer but too small to serve two, but I suspected Jerry, who'd looked up and blushed when I arrived, had influenced his dad to give it to me. It did look delicious though, and caramel apple was one of my favorites of Jack's flavors.

  When I got home, I put the cheesecake in the fridge and the oranges on the counter then took Paddington out for a quick walk. Luckily Gertrude had realized I hadn't been home and had walked him and given him his dinner, so he wasn't as upset as he would have been otherwise, but I did feel bad he'd been left alone so long, and not just because he'd chewed up one of my newly acquired slippers.

  After he'd had his walk and I'd rubbed the snow off his feet and fur with an old towel and cleaned up the slipper bits, I settled onto the couch with my huge slice of caramel apple heaven. I sent a mental thank you to Jack and Jerry, then rested my fork on the bottom of the box to savor the moment before savoring the dessert.

  Then I stopped savoring, and the words 'good to myself' rang through my head.

  I stared at the cheesecake.

  I remembered how full I'd been the last time I'd eaten a piece, how sick I'd felt.

  Then I stood up without consciously deciding to do so.

  Moments later, I was at Gertrude's front door.

  "Hello, dear," she said. "Is everything okay? I saw you hadn't come home."

  I nodded. "A coworker needed my help. Everything's fine now, and I just wanted to thank you for taking such good care of Paddington." I held out the cheesecake box. "This is for you." Now.

  She looked at the box then back at me. "Is that from Jack's?"

  "Yup. Caramel apple."

  "And you're giving it to me? My goodness, Lydia, I've never heard of anyone giving away Jack's cheesecake."

  "Me either." I smiled at her. "Take it before I change my mind."

  She called over her shoulder, "Put your teeth in, Donald, Lydia's brought us a treat."

  I managed to hold back a giggle, but it was close.

  She looked back at me. "Would you like to come share it with us?"

  "Thanks, but no. I want you to have it."

  I wasn't actually sure I did want that any more, since I'd never given away cheesecake before and I was questioning my sanity for doing it now, so I figured I should get home before I ripped the box from her hands.

  "Well, that's very sweet of you, dear. We'll enjoy it. And of course you're quite welcome about Paddington. He's a lovely dog. Just a little rambunctious."

  She didn't even know about the newly chewed slipper. "That he is. I'll see you later, Gertrude."

  "Good night, dear."

  I went home, and when I opened the door I could smell the oranges Sasha had given me. They were no cheesecake but maybe one would do for a snack.

  I returned to the couch with an orange and a plate for the peels, and in moments I knew I was right that an orange was no cheesecake.

  It was so much better.

  Each section burst in my mouth, sending its clean fresh sunshiny flavor everywhere. While the cheesecake would have been rich and heavy, the orange was light and pure and the taste seemed to dance on my tongue.

  I savored each bite slowly, and when I was finished I felt alive in a way I'd never felt after cheesecake.

  I'd never have thought a fruit could be more luxurious than a 'real' dessert, but Sasha's orange had proven me wrong.

  Chapter Nineteen

  "You must have been terrified."

  I shrugged, not wanting to admit it. "She's four years old. I kind of had a size advantage."

  "But still, a little kid, and not your own..." Felix shook his head. "I can't believe you did that for Sasha."

  I frowned. "Why not? You think I'm that much of a jerk that I'd let her suffer?"

  He gave my forearm a squeeze, leaving his warm hand resting on my bare skin. "I think you're great, and you know it. But you gave up a bunch of work time yesterday, and that date too, for someone who isn't even your friend." He stroked his hand down my arm and off over my hand. "This 'good to yourself' project is changing you."

  Something in his tone said it wasn't changing me for the better, and I didn't like it. "The date's been rescheduled, and I can make up the work time if that's what's worrying you."

  He blinked. "Of course not. I know you work hard." He leaned a little closer. "You're the best one here, and we both know it." His eyes held mine. "I just don't want to see you go soft. Part of why you're so good is because you don't get all squishy in your posts. You keep a little distance from your readers. It helps."

  I had never set out to keep any distance, and I was about to say so when he said, "You've got bad taste in staff recommendations, though. Percy's excuse for today is that his building's being fumigated and he has to stay home. He said he might come in after lunch but here we are and here he's not."

  "But if it's being fumigated wouldn't he have to--" I said before remembering Percy using that exact excuse ten years ago to get himself fired from a job his mother had got him that he didn't want to have any more.

&nb
sp; "Exactly. He'd have to be out of the building, not in it. He's screwing with me and I don't like it. If he's not here tomorrow..." He shrugged. "I know he's your friend, but he'll have to go."

  I nodded. "I'll find out what's going on."

  "When's your date with Calvin now?"

  "Friday night." I pushed back my chair since the work talk was apparently done, wanting to escape the small conference room that had been the scene of our kiss and which I now felt strange being in with Felix.

  "Too bad."

  I looked up, surprised. "Why?"

  He gave me a lazy sexy smile. "Because I'm not Calvin."

  Electricity snapped between us for a moment, then he said, "I guess we should get back to work."

  "Um, yeah."

  He held the door open for me, brushing his hand down my back as I left the conference room ahead of him, and I went back to my desk and tried to look like I was working and not like I was imagining naked antics on that conference table.

  *****

  Once I'd cooled down, I sent Percy a text message.

  What are you doing? We need to talk.

  After ten minutes of no response, I sent another.

  You know I won't give up. Might as well answer me.

  I gave that one five minutes.

  Okay, fine. I'm on my way over.

  This got a response.

  You don't have my address.

  I smiled, glad I'd made him break his silence.

  Wrong, buddy. You emailed me your resume for Felix, remember? Address is on that. What's going on?

  He didn't answer, but I received an email message a few minutes later.

  Lydia,

  I'm okay, really. I'm just not cut out to work there. I'll send Felix an email to let him know. Thanks for getting me the job, though, I really appreciate it.